6 things I learnt this last week

I love learning.

I once heard someone say that if we’re not learning, we’re not growing. I believe that.

I also have a strange habit of reading multiple books at once. Or maybe you do that too? Hey, we can both be unusual together:)

I do actually finish most of them, but I just find it more interesting reading about more than one subject at a time, particularly if they are non-fiction books. Maybe it’s because I get bored easily. Or I’m just not normal – I don’t know 🙂

So, I’ve picked out 6 things I’ve learnt this last week that really struck me. Do you ever have that, where something just jumps out of the page and speaks to you? I do. I sit up and take notice when that happens because it means it’s for me right now.

So here are the 6 things because maybe something will speak to you too…I hope so.

On relationships…

1. Men & women are very different, but also have many similar needs

Know what they are? According to Dr Mike Bechtle, in the book “I wish he came with instructions”, these are the needs that BOTH men and women have :
– To be loved
– To be respected
– To be needed
– To be focussed on – ie. another person is intentional about caring for us.
– To be noticed
– To be valued
– To be listened to
– To be encouraged

Read those slowly, again. Wow. When I look at that list, I know there’s room for improvement in how I treat my spouse. I love that one about focussing on your partner – being intentional about caring for them. It takes effort though, to be intentional. That tells me it involves thinking, planning, going out of your way.

On accepting yourself…

2. “I am still a work-in-progress like everyone else on the planet” – Paula Conway, entrepreneur

This was what you’d call a random sentence in the foreword of a book I’m reading, but oh my, it just caught my attention.

Why?

Because I realised that I expect myself NOT to be a work-in-progress. And in reading this, and really letting it sink in, I literally almost breathed a sigh of relief that – yes – it’s okay not to be perfect. And that no-one else is either.

Don’t you find that we look at others, and just find ourselves imagining that somehow they have it all figured out more than us? Well, they probably don’t. They’re probably looking at you thinking the same thing. Ha!

So give yourself a break! Take a deep breath and allow yourself to be imperfectly YOU.

On success…

3. Success is never convenient – Dani Johnson, success coach

Ouch. Okay, so it means I’m going to have to do some work if I want my relationships to be great, and if I want to succeed in my business or work, and if I want my financial situation to get better. It’s not just going to change without me taking some determined action, without me inconveniencing myself sometimes.

On impossible situations…

4.” God loves with a great love the man whose heart is bursting with a passion for the impossible” – William Booth

I just love this sentence because I need to continually keep a taste for the impossible in my life. If I’ve got problems and situations that are looking a bit impossible, well then I need to change the way I look at it and believe that even the impossible can become possible. It can change. Am I believing that though? This really challenges me!

On the way we think…

5. We are products of the thinking around us

“All of us, more than we recognise, are products of the thinking around us. And much of this thinking is little.” – David Schwartz in ‘The magic of thinking big’.
I’m re-reading this book on ‘thinking big’ and it struck me again how much we are impacted by our environment – the people around us – what they say, what they do and how they think. We become like them, whether or not we want to. We become like the adverts we see, the movies we watch, the books we read and the people we hang around.

So, what’s the thinking like of the people who are around you? And do you LIKE the way they think? I’ve got to ask myself – is this the kind of thinking I want? My husband and I had dinner last night with a couple of friends we love dearly – Julie and Rolf – and I absolutely love the way they think.

I come away impacted every time I spend time with them.

Rolf is excelling in a very demanding job and Julie is working in our local community as a youth worker, as well as working part time as a consultant. She is such a giver – she’s mentoring disadvantaged youth so they’ll have a better future than they would if not for her in their lives. She’s had to deal with youth who swear at her, get into fights with each other, have nothing worthwhile to live for and sometimes resist her efforts – and she does it for free!! All because she believes passionately in their potential. Amazing!

She’s also fundraising for children in poverty and helping and inspiring people wherever she goes. There’s more that she does, but the stories are too many to list here. Now that’s some thinking I am happy to be a product of!

On our consistent actions…

6. What we do consistently is what shapes our lives

“If we want to direct our lives, we must take control of our consistent actions. It’s not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives, but what we do consistently.” – Tony Robbins in ‘Awaken the Giant within’

I just love to do great things once in a while! It’s fun and it’s exciting (and yes, I said it before, I get bored easily). My personality is less like the snail and much more like the hare. More like fireworks than a long-life lightbulb.

And yet I know, like Aristotle said, ‘We are what we repeatedly do’. Hmmm….consistent action. Habits. Doing the same thing daily, whether we feel like it or not. It may be a bit dull, but that’s what shapes our lives. I’m working on doing more good things, habitually, rather than on and off.

How about you? Did you learn anything interesting this week in something you read? Did it leap out of the page and whack you in the face? Let me know about it – I’d love to hear your experiences too.